Archive for the 'role' Category


Let’s get busy!

let's get busyMake any New Year’s resolutions?  I did.  Actually, I’ve been thinking of it for quite some time and began it with my last post made in December.  “What was it?” you may ask.  It was to get busy!

The book and motion picture “Wild,” has been getting a lot of attention.   Society’s response to a strong female and her journey through grief to self-discovery has been encouraging.  It’s also been an awakening to the media for the need for more pivotal female roles on the page, stage and screen.  During a radio interview with Reese Witherspoon, the star and producer of the film adaptation of Cheryl Strayed’s book, “Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail,” Witherspoon referenced the lack of complex roles for women and responded by not only saying, but putting into action her comment:  “…nobody is doing this work.  I might as well get busy and do it myself.”

Obviously we don’t all have the resources like Witherspoon, but we do share the same perspective.  As a result, instead of expecting others to address the needs which have already been identified, I have decided to join Witherspoon and “get busy.”  What does this mean?  I believe that in each of our lives in our own way, we can make a difference to bring about change for gender equality.  From standing up for ourselves or others when confronted by sexism or working to make more opportunities for women available, we all contribute to society’s transformation.  No action is too small, so we must not minimize our efforts.  It’s changing our very way of thinking as a community; embracing our egalitarianism.

Awareness, education and recognition are vital.  However, without following that up with action in our daily lives, our society tends to find contentment with labeling gender discrimination as simply one of many issues which need addressing.  “Issues” tend not to have the same concern as crisis.  Why is it not a national crisis that women do not receive equal pay for equal work?  Why is it not a global crisis that women are surrounded and trapped by violence, rape and sex trafficking?  When perceived as an issue, it weakens the urgency of our condition.   This is nothing less than a crisis which demands action.

So let’s get busy!

Read interview with Reese Witherspoon


Support women artists by buying the book “Wild:  From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail” by Cheryl Strayed and see the movie.


independent together

independent togetherWhy does society view independence differently for men and women?

When my husband decided to go back to college later in life I was 100% on board.  However, the only way to logically do it so that it wouldn’t take ten years, was for him to quit his job which demand all of his daytime hours.  Thankfully, I had a job and we were in a financial position which allowed me to support us during that time.  I had no problem with it because after two years into it I decided I wanted to go back to school as well and was eager for him to finish.

Unfortunately, others weren’t as accepting of this arrangement, however egalitarian as it appeared to us.  Many were surprised and seemingly disappointed that he did not work at all, even part time.  After all, it was his “role” to be the provider; to contribute something financially.  We were the ones who were disappointed because we felt betrayed by those who would condemn us for investing in ourselves and our future.

Now that the tables are turned, no one seems to have a problem with it.  Yes, there have been two men who have accused me of being a trophy wife and mooch to my face, but after hearing my story they shamefully retract their statements.  No one even really asks me if I work.  Once I say I am a student, that seems to be sufficient to fulfill my “role,” whatever that is to them.  Things are back to “normal” and our relationship makes sense to them once again.

These kinds of attitudes blow my mind.  One is aggressive and one is passive but they both have the same effect; sexism.  Why do we as supposedly advanced human beings box ourselves into these little and truly patronizing roles?  Why can’t we all understand, male or female, that having a loss of independence is difficult for both sexes and not acceptable for one more than another?

Why can’t we celebrate and fight for our independence together?